Bring a big pot of water to a rolling boil and toss in your prawns for 1-2 minutes until they turn nice and pink. Save a cup of that prawn water - trust me on this one!
Shock those prawns in cold water, then peel and devein them. If they're big fellas, cut each one into 3 pieces. Set aside.
Soak your noodles in warm water until softened, then drain. Bring another pot of water to a hard boil and cook the noodles for just 2 minutes - you want them tender but not soft like mush.
Drain the noodles good and spread them on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Let them dry for at least 30 minutes - this is key for getting that proper fry on them. Spray with a little oil. (The drying step is what gives you those crispy golden noodles instead of soggy ones)
Heat your lard (or coconut oil if you want to keep it light) in a large wok until it's smoking hot. Fry the noodles in batches - don't crowd them - until they're golden and crispy. Remove and keep warm.
Add more oil if needed and toss in the garlic and onion. Let them get fragrant, then add all your meats - prawns, chicken, pork, and ham. Stir-fry until everything's cooked through.
Add the shredded cabbage, soy sauce, and that reserved prawn stock. Season with salt and pepper - go easy on the salt since the soy sauce is already salty.
Cook uncovered, stirring occasionally, until almost all the liquid has evaporated and everything looks glossy and good.
Toss the crispy noodles back in and mix everything together until heated through. Plate it up nice and garnish with some of the prettier pieces of meat and those lemon wedges.
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